I could make a list of many of the wise sayings friends have shared over the years, but this one stuck with me as it captures that which I have oft observed but never been able to express so well as my friend, Dana. We were talking about life and how it seems that many people who began extremely conservatively in their Christian walk, became wildly liberal in their later years and we’d observed those who were incredibly liberal become exceptionally conservative to the point of legalism. I often said people dislike balance because it is so hard to maintain. Extremes are easily defined. Staying even keel that is the real trick.
To this Dana replied, “People don’t correct. They tend to over-correct.”
That’s it precisely. I recall a couple with whom I attended university who married a year or two after we did. The wife’s vows were so “submissive” I thought it staggering that the minister approved them, if indeed he saw them beforehand. She was marrying a flawed human being, not the Lord, yet she vowed total submission to this man’s will, to have him be her priest and the priest of her family, and the entire vow sounded like this man was to her as Jesus is to us all. I won’t even broach the topic of the priesthood of all believers.
Five decades later, of course, life changed. They remain a lovely couple who apparently became progressively liberal over the years and one time suggested I might want to “get out and get to know someone in the LGBTQ+ community.” I think the reasoning was if I believe in the Bible, which I do, and being a missionary, which I am, I am in some bubble removed from the real world, which is about as ridiculous a notion one can have if they do the kind of work I do. We spend our entire lives with people and cultures unlike ourselves. I was unsure whether to be mildly insulted by the assumption or amused, so when in doubt, assume the best and I opted to find it funny. Keeping things in perspective, they lived in the same place their whole lives, which makes it very easy to form opinions about places one only seems on TV. I assured them we do not live in alone in a cave and we know people from every possible walk of life. I find no conflict between loving and enjoying people who do not believe as I do, and yet maintaining my beliefs without compromise. I dare say I believe the same things now, that I have for decades but on a much deeper level. I have shed some of my former certainties, but none regarding doctrine.
Another couple, once very demonstrative charismatics, decided that it was best to toss that out the window and moved to a colony to adopt a lifestyle that is reminiscent of two centuries ago. It was a challenge as the husband had difficulty growing a beard, but the wife donned attire befitting their new faith community and I am sure they have exceptionally low power bills.
Why do we make such radical swings in our theology and behavior?
Disappointment is one the key reasons people make wild over-corrections. They prayed for a miracle that did not occur, so they conclude the days of miracles are past. Perhaps they prayed for many miracles and did not receive that for which they prayed. Miracles are miracles because they are the exception to the ordinary, not the ordinary, and if read scripture with perspective, we realize that the apostles experienced times of unprecedented miracles, along with times of non-miracles that resulted in almost all of them suffering martyrdom. Thankfully, they did not cease to pray for the supernatural.
Delusion is yet another reason people walk out the door of churches, leave ministries, and abandon all to which we are called to hold dear. As surely as the sun rises, if you live more than a decade, you are bound to run into some quacks. I realize that might not be the theologically correct term but suffice to say there are people are “over the top” in some area or another, there are people who are mentally unstable, and there are even tares among the wheat. If you only bump into two or three of these kind of folks in your lifetime, consider yourself blessed. There’s a lot of unwell people outside the church, but there we have more normal expectations of humanity. That we meet the unwell in church, should not be a shock. Yes, there’s a time to shake the dust off your feet and move to a healthier place, but just as you have that odd uncle or slightly batty cousin, we don’t throw the baby out with the bath water because people are not well. I have heard people tell me they left church because “everyone is a hypocrite.” That makes no sense because all of humanity is hypocritical, at least according to the Book of Romans, so don’t let is be an excuse. If you’re reading this you might be a hypocrite I like very much and perhaps I’m a hypocrite that you enjoy. To be human is to be a hypocrite to some degree.
Family is another area that tosses people for a loop in later life. Disagreeing with your parents is totally acceptable. When your children take an extra-biblical position, it is staggering how many people, under the guise of being good listeners and not wanting to be at odds with their adult children, suddenly start making peace with things they would once have recognized as unscriptural. We do not need to agree with everyone we love, nor they with us. We do need to stay faithful to the Bible, because the Bible is not wrong, and the teachings of Jesus are not like a buffet where we pick and choose.We do not draw our children to faith by bending it to accommodate our loved ones. One can love well without violating truth.
So how do we avoid over-correction?
The answer is simple, but the application much less easy to work out. We are saved by grace, not by works, yet grace is evidenced by our works. We now live by the law of love. That “love” is not human love, but a godly love that recognizes that what is evil, is truly evil, and what is harmful is truly harmful. We recognize that we are all hurtful and do evil, and yet are so greatly loved, that God Himself is the only one who can rightly judge us. He alone is so good He can the pay the terrible penalty that is deserved. Jesus called out sin, named it in places that never crossed our minds, and then paid the most horrific penalty to show us just how bad sin really is. He then rose from the dead, to not only show us that death is not permanent but to remind us Who He Is in the first place, less we fall into any nonsense thinking He was mere prophet or man.
We cannot be people of grace, unless we also are people of truth and holiness, just as God has shown Himself to be when He chose to manifest Himself in the Person of Jesus. We cannot get through life by having a long list of what is and is not acceptable. We can navigate the rushing waters by imitating Jesus. It’s far simpler to remember our goal is to follow the “Word Made Flesh.”
Notice, however, I said it is simpler, not easier. It is, however, the only safe way to stay true to Truth, Love and Hope, as embodied in the Lord. Our lives might be messy and difficult, but they need not be overly complex. Stay the course and keep your eyes fixed.
Things You Did Not Learn in Bible College 