Category: leadership

Ministry is a Real Job

Thirty-six years ago, I was attending what was then called, “District Council”, the annual meeting of ministers in our region of the country.  I remember the message well, because the speaker had the good sense to speak the truth in humor, which in our neck of the woods is the same thing as love. Laying a foundation of scripture, he pointed out that many a ministry struggles because the ground where the worker labors is hard ground. Many other ministries, however, struggle because the stewards of the ministry simply don’t show up and put in the work necessary to see fruit.  He told the story of a pastor who complained of the challenges where he worked, and with whom he spent a week to observe how things functioned in the church on a daily basis. What struck him most was that the pastor arrived at 9:30 in the morning, had his devotions, and by the time 11 AM rolled around felt it was too close to lunch time to begin anything new, so he would go home for two to three hours for family time. He would then return in the afternoon around 2 PM and finish up around 4 PM when the church secretary left the office.  For clearly predictable reasons, he was often stressed out on Saturdays trying to prepare his message for Sunday morning and again for the evening service. He was working about ten to fifteen hours a week, plus speaking on Wednesday night and twice on Sunday. 

I recall a church planter who said the best thing that ever happened to him was getting off a church staff and having to plant.  To launch the church he needed a part time secular job and he had his first glimpse into the lives of his congregation.  The people who attend your church are out the door at 7 AM to get to work by 8 AM and rare is the soul who works only 8 hours in a day.  In our years leading up to full time ministry we worked about 50 hours a week at our regular jobs, drove straight to church, and were there for volunteer staff meetings, youth events, and the twice Sunday service.  That meant we spent another 12 to 15 hours a week at church after our secular jobs, and the commute to church was about thirty minutes each way.

The pastor under whom we worked, had four kids and a house close to the church, and recognizing that his volunteer staff was fairly hungry by 8:30 PM would often have us all over and his wife would cook something up, so we were happy as we headed back home to rise at 5:30 the next morning.  (I was normally at work by 7AM and left about 6PM).  The staff were all full time professionals but one mom, who was a full time mom, which as we all know, is a 24/7 occupation.

As I look at the young people making an impact, they understand the importance of “showing up”.  If they are tired, or the baby cried all night or whatever else it might be, they take their ministerial work for what it is: a matter of life and death for the lost.  They understand that if the people supporting the work of the ministry, do not have checks magically appear on their desks but must spend time in prayer and intercession before they attend their day job, and often are showing up at service after a long and stressful day at work. That is entirely healthy. It is a sign of good stewardship.

In these days of storytelling, influencing, and social media, there are invariably people who appear to be doing a great deal when in fact, they are just really super with media.  I have read posts and chuckled, because I either knew the real story, or recognized that a moving and emotional post that would cause people to believe they were following a planet shaker, was in fact, created by someone who spent about an hour on the job and an equal amount of time “content creating” to keep themselves employed.  The kingdom of God is not so built.

We rely on the strength and the power of the Holy Spirit.  We have a message so compelling that if we truly believe it, we will be unable to keep it to ourselves.  To share the gospel effectively, no matter what form of ministry in which one is involved, also requires an honest work ethic.  If you do not put as much time and effort into ministry as you would if you had a secular job, you need to remember to Whom you ultimately will give an account.  “It is required of a steward, that a man be found faithful” (I Cor. 4:2).  Be faithful.  Work at ministry with the at the very least, the level of commitment you would be required to give to a secular employer.  Daily faithfulness, will bring rewards.

What To Do When Leadership Sins (Part Two)

This post took a long time to write because it is painful. I am years removed from my own head-on experience with devastating sin in leadership but it remains painful to reflect on it. Most will go a lifetime without personally confronting morally comprised leadership but others will not. I write this from my own personal experience.

Don’t Compromise Scripture

If the Bible forbids something, it is forbidden. If you are under leadership that tells you to participate in or overlook something illegal, immoral or un-scriptural, do not do it.  When a leader is stressing that “You are under my covering”, yet is covering up evil, remember that evil is something we don’t cover up. Many a fallen man has cherry picked the verse, “I will not touch the Lord’s anointed”, while ignoring the fact it refers to David’s refusal to kill a man in cold blood while he went to the toilet. That does not justify protecting sinful leadership. Any leader who identifies with Saul should cause you to follow David’s example: do no violence, pray, and go far away.

Don’t Be Shocked

For some reason, when leadership sins, we are shocked. The scriptures warn of false shepherds and wolves in sheep clothing, ‘super apostles’ who live to exploit and all other manner of deception. Jesus forewarned us that there would be leaders who sin and everything Jesus said is true.

Don’t Be Confused

Invariably, someone will suggest you need to be passive in the face of leadership sin. The mantra will be that you must watch, pray and trust God to deal with the situation. Like all half-truths, it is 50% wrong.  You watch, pray and trust God but you do not need to be passive. Jesus was not passive about the Pharisees. The New Testament writers address corrupt leadership, sometimes by name and not very gently either. (Examples: 2 Peter 2, 3 John, 2 Corinthians 9-11). Do not accept in the church that which you would never tolerate from the secular world.

Don’t Answer Fools According to Their Folly

Read Toxic Faith. You are not crazy. The authors point out that corrupt leaders normally attack those who are trying to help them. It will happen. Do not waste time defending yourself. The leader hiding wrongdoing is creating the proverbial smoke screen and you are in it.  You can fight fires but not smoke.  A person committed to a destructive and foolish course of action can only exhaust and damage you if you try and engage them on their own terms.

Years ago, after privately addressing an issue with a leader, I learned that the man accessed my private medical records. I was stunned. Within a month, he went even further and issued a letter of reprimand that detailed a series of fabricated events. He created detailed descriptions of my anti-leadership “offenses” but got so lost in the minutiae that he didn’t check my travel schedule. Providentially, he fabricated offenses on three dates when I was not in the country where he claimed I was at the time he claimed I had said or done X, Y, Z.  Although he lied and I had the boarding passes to prove it, this had no bearing on the outcome. Moral of the story: you cannot rationalize with irrational people and the scripture tells us not to do so.

Don’t Neglect Matthew 18

The instructions given in Matthew 18 are meant to protect us not only from sin but also from slander. If you address sin and are not heard, bring someone with you. If there is no response, bring the matter to the church, or, if that avenue is closed, to the larger church leadership. Likewise, if you are falsely accused insist that there be witnesses and the accusations made public. In the situation mentioned above, I was confident no rational group of people would believe I could exist simultaneously on multiple continents. The leadership’s response when I asked for scriptural treatment was, “We would never do that so we don’t embarrass you and your family”.  Refusal to follow scripture proves the lack of integrity of the charge.

Don’t Go Herd

People like to stay safe and in areas that touch our spiritual life, we are very vulnerable. Never compromise your integrity for the sake of playing it safe and going with the large body of believers. Avoid the ‘herd mentality’. If you can get 100 people to participate in 1% of a wrong, they will feel 99% justified and 100% of a wrong can be completed. Don’t overlook an evil because you can see the good you can do if you don’t rock the boat.

Part of our ministry is to model that which is healthy and right. If that includes facing evil, calling it by name, suffering as a result and seeing the bigger picture, accept it and do so for the honor of Jesus.  He has done this all before us and so obtained His crown.

What To Do When Your Leaders Are Wrong: Part One

Several years ago, I read the book Toxic Faith. It sounded like the organizational handbook of the para-church ministry from which I had just resigned. While I wish my situation were unique, it was not and books are written because bad leadership does exist. Having said that, truly ‘toxic’ situations are not the norm, so this first blog is meant to address the more normal situational conflicts that arise when ‘your leaders are wrong’.

It’s important to define terms. Someone is “wrong” when their actions are contrary to that which is moral, ethical, and biblical.  There’s a myriad of things your leaders can do that are not, in your opinion, good judgement, but they are not “wrong”. It not morally wrong to be outdated, disorganized, inexperienced, non-intuitive or culturally naïve. Being any of those things will hinder the effectiveness of a ministry but it’s not morally wrong to be ineffective. This is not to raise inefficiency to a virtue but suffice to say it is not a moral vice.

Most of the time, if you have a conflict with a leader there is a difference of opinion, personality or generation, that is of no moral consequence.  I know that I make decisions that appear as though I am shooting from my aging hips when in fact I am making a decision based on more factors than I can reasonably articulate. Leaders should expect to answer reasonable questions, asked at a reasonable place and time. If you see your leader make a significant choice with which you don’t agree, make note of it and ask him or her about it, privately, at an appropriate time. Pick your topics wisely. If you don’t like the color scheme of the church nursery, get over it. If you lead youth group and don’t understand why certain activities are not permitted, ask those in authority in a private context. Questions asked publicly are often perceived (and subliminally intended) as a challenge to leadership. If you are asking in an appropriate way but get a response that is demeaning, and such responses are the norm, you have a real problem. (Be sure to read the next blog.)

But what do we do when leaders we love make poor choices?  How do you respond when your pastor is discouraged that people don’t participate in worship but you realize that having a music team that consists of a tambourine and zither player has made congregational participation difficult?

Step One: Talk to your leader.  In a healthy situation, you can probably talk most things out with your leader.  Maybe your pastor does not realize there are affordable alternatives to a live worship band. Maybe he secretly has nightmares about the zither, too. Most leaders are approachable if you are respectful. Be nice. Buy his/her coffee. Listen to your leader as much as you want him or her to listen to you. Maybe your pastor will be thrilled if you take ownership of the solution.  Give it a shot.

Step Two: Ask yourself why you are serving where you are. If you know the Lord called you to a certain ministry, stay where you are and wait until the Lord tells you to go. If your leaders are making poor choices that are not “wrong” perhaps your faithful service will win the right to be heard so there will be a change. Renting an inflatable castle for VBS is not an issue of right or wrong. The decision may not go your way, but if you are not the final authority for the church, remember that Christians in the world suffer fates worse than outdated VBS choices.

The bottom line is most issues are not issues of right or wrong.  Sadly, some issues are, when your leaders are truly wrong you will be on track for a very difficult road. That is why this is a two-part blog.